Have you had your child's haircut? The horrendous haircut that scarred my daughter !!

The start of the hair story!

my baby girl's hair at 8 months

When I had my baby girl, she was born with quite a bit of hair on her head. By six months it was long enough to tie up little small ponytails. Yes it was a little fuss...but I would quickly put her in front of the TV...do her hair and that was it. Usually by another few hours it was a mess...with the hair covering her eyes...and still I didn't want her very first hairs cut off.  By nine months the hair grew near shoulders with small curls at the end and I absolutely loved them but doing the hair was becoming a more surmountable task.

The aunt who loves cutting  hair!
It was around this time my aunt-in-law from India made her first visit to London to stay with us. I was a bit nervous because she happens to be very career oriented and savvy interior designer in Chennai. I was relieved to find out that when she is on holiday she tends to take a step back and have fun. We loved having her over and as I have grown to know her more - I think she happens to be a closet hair stylist - I say this because every time she is here - she either wants to cut my hair or my daughter's. So while her first stay here, she was adamant that she cut my little girls hair so after a while I conceded. So as I kept my little girl busy, my aunt in law chopped of her hair and we realized she looked much cuter with her hair short.

The lady barber who scared my daughter!
 So from then on, every few months as they grew, I took my daughter to the lady's barber who does my husband's hair. My daughter sat on my lap and the lady cut her hair. So far first trip no problems and I was happy that I didn't have to bother about doing up her hair anymore. I think it happened to be her third visit to the barber when she was a bit petrified of her hair being cut in front and wasn't too happy about it falling on her face. So she started to cry when the lady went right to her face and in her polish accent militaristic voice loudly told my daughter  Shh...shh...shh..NO! NO! NO! .stop crying stop crying....now my daughter was even more petrified that she started balling away. More so I  haven't been a situation like this before I wasn't sure what to do, I tried to pacify my daughter but the lady kept on telling my daughter shh...shh...KEEP QUIET!! We were nearly done with her haircut and I just wanted to take my daughter home. After a few months I went back, hoping my daughter had forgotten about the event but she took one look at the lady and she refused to have her haircut. She pulled out such a tantrum that I had to take her home. We have tried cutting at home but the event for now had scarred her from anyone approaching a scissors through her hair.

Loving our local northwood library

Its taken me awhile to get my foot out that door to attend the local child classes in my community. For a long time I have been feeling a sense of apprehension of being an insecure new mother, being partially deaf and not facing all the judgement from other mothers. But I have finally got out, more like pushed myself out, my daughter has become a high energy  toddler and staying at home isn't an option.  She loves going out, her favorite words are shoes because it means we are out and about. This means to me that the needs of my daughter comes first and  I need to discard my fears and insecurity, its certainly not helping her.

So my first emphasis was getting to the weekly  story and rhyme sessions they had at our local library. The Northwood library is a small two story building where at the top level is more the quiet room with books for adults and college students and at the lower level they have a small area for the kids  with shelves of toddler, baby and self- help mommy books. Also they have colorful tables and animal chairs with paper and crayons for coloring.  What I love is that its usually full with kids of all ages and descent and makes me wonder why I was so afraid to attend, it seems so harmless and make me realize the insecurities were all in my head.

The classes are  usually held on Wednesday at 10am. In the kids area, the little tables and chairs have been pushed aside and a colorful cloth is put on the ground for all the toddlers to sit and also there is a box of rattles. The class is usually packed and we all sit around. There are two librarian who read the  books and nursery rhymes are very engaging. The first week I took my daughter she was literally shocked to see so many children and more so they knew all the rhymes she did. For the first few weeks, my daughter was in the stare and observe mode but since now we have been so often she has started participating in the rhymes which I am really glad. At the end of the rhyming session, they always have a creative making project which I absolutely love .My daughter might not be there yet to enjoy making them, but once we are done she loves it.Here are some of the projects we have done so far :

I think that is amazing that have these classes for babies and toddlers. I am happy that I am able to take her, it has also made me give in to absconding those fears of mine. My child is happy and I am happy. If you are like me, don't deter taking your child. For more information you can look at the local library website.

Four Lessons I learnt as a first time parent

Being a first time parent its both exciting and nerve racking. But along the way I have learnt a few life lessons regarding parenting.

• One never burn bridges with your parents, relative or family members (especially if they live close by)because you  have no idea how much help they can when you are bringing up your own. I had my step-mom come all the way from the US to UK and stayed over for a month after my little one was born. I had an emergency Caesarean section and was unable to do anything except for breast feeding. My step-mom took over from doing the simplest things as cooking, doing our laundry and more so helping looking after my baby when I did need my rest. 

• Family is good but you also should know where to set your boundaries. They will have 101 suggestions on how to raise your kid. Take the advice but do what you know is best for your child. Don't let them overwhelm you, you might be a first time parent but you are not an idiot.

•  You are never always going to get it right. So don't depress yourself  over it. Having kids even if you are ready at your best - you will never be as ready because every child is different and come with their own set of characteristics. Sometimes harder the work or sometimes easier. For example: you might have a baby who sleeps well right from the gecko or  your baby can keep you up all night.

•  Don't forget to take the first aid classes for babies. There is lot of help provided. Attend  a mother's group , take your child to the local libraries for story time - it helps you and your baby socially. For a long time I was a recluse, I thought that people are going to judge me and look at me oddly. Don't let things like this get you down because I have realised we are all on the same boat starting of as a mommy.