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Friday, June 28, 2013

How was your day today?


I have my good days, I have my semi-good-bad days and I have my bad days. It all depends on how I start my day and  my dysfunctional moods. Today is one of my semi -good- bad days. I would account this to that I feel some sense of brightness in my spirit - my writing is  is doing fine but everything else seems in chaos. So lets talk about the bad part of the day - getting up to rain and rain - I should be used to it by now that I have been living in London for the past 5 years but I have to say it still gets to me. Since my spirit is not so bad, I am not feeling the maximum brunt of it today but there are days I can just peek at the cloudy wet weather on my window and I just want to hover back under the covers and sleep and let the day pass me by. This never happens since I have a toddler who is awake and needs my attention.

 During the week, morning we get ready and I do the 30 minute walk to the children center where my toddler gets to play and socialize, the classes last about an hour and half and I trudge back the 30 minute (my  daily exercise)walk back home or take the long trek to do some groceries and back home. Absolutely exhausted, eat and put the little one in for a nap. Its Friday and I have allowed to give myself a break from all the walking and that means no class for the little one. Therefore this day accounts to boredom for my toddler, given that we have played half an hour of building blocks, half an hour of playing tea time and an hour of just dancing and prancing around the living room to some nursery rhymes and yet now there is nothing to do. Of course mommy here does have a horrendous hours of chores to do but she prefers to continue to dancing and not think of the 101 tasks.

The 101 tasks constitute to my feeling bad mood day- I think we mommy's have all been there. I got to clean, I got to iron, I got to vacuum, I got to cook dinner, I got to do laundry- I got to..I got to..I got to..- but I don't want to!!!!I have people over the weekend -yikes!!  I wish I knew earlier that being a mommy means - all home chores would ultimately come down to me - then I would have paid much more attention to my home science class. Its not the fact that I got to do them but its the guilt of procrastinating it because I absolutely abhor doing them. I have tried changing my perspective on how I think about chores - and this is far as I have got - they need to be done and I am happy and feel a sense of satisfaction when its all done!! So got get cracking!! I guiltily put on mickey mouse for the little one's entertainment promising myself I'll take her to the park when the weather gets better!

Thursday, June 27, 2013

What motivates your writing?

I have been sitting here stuck trying to write, a blank page before me and a blank screen in my mind. I love to write and and want to write but the words usually don't come just when I am at my desk. And especially this frustrates me because otherwise all I do is think of ideas, and  ideas to write but then when I come down it I have nothing to show so I leave frustrated and say Ill start again another day and so goes a vicious cycle and no writing gets done. But today I have decided to sit and not give up. Close my eyes and just write, write whatever comes to mind and truly now I am getting somewhere.

So what truly motivates you to write? For me, its having a passion for writing, and the need to improve on my writing but I don't always have those days.  I am one of those who give up easily unless I force myself to. I have never been fond of my writing and so my quest is to build and work my writing. So it just happened one day while I was reading an article, I read that one of the keys to good writing is to emulate good writers and since my writing is mostly blogging, I googled in top ten bloggers of  2013. This is where I found Joe Bunting -  thewritepractice.com- something I really needed to practice my writing. I also found Jeff Goins -goinswriter.com/‎ -  his writing truly keeps me motivated. Its writers and feeling part of a community of writers where you writing can get constructive feedback like 'The Write Practice' that holds onto my motivation.

Do you daydream your writing? Just before I go to bed, its when my mind works the most and all ideas and words come through just like they are in sync with one another. These are the moments I think my best writing comes along.When I was back in high school , writing was a big chore and I usually left it to the last minute. And there was one day, when I went to bed, in the middle of the night I thought of my assigned essay topic and how to go about it and so I got up and wrote it out. It was the first draft and I didn't think much I was just happy it was done but when I did receive the results I was surprised that I had an A. Same went for my running a 5 K race, I used to plan out running the whole route in my mind in the night, the day before the race and the next day at the race I always improved on my time. So I have understood that mind can be an amazing tool and focusing on what I love truly motivates my results.

I don't know what motivates you, but  for me being part of community that motivates my passion, dreaming and showing up that it can really happen is what keeps me getting there.

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Loving our local northwood library



Its taken me awhile to get my foot out that door to attend the local child classes in my community. For a long time I have been feeling a sense of apprehension of being an insecure new mother, being partially deaf and not facing all the judgement from other mothers. But I have finally got out, more like pushed myself out, my daughter has become a high energy  toddler and staying at home isn't an option.  She loves going out, her favorite words are shoes because it means we are out and about. This means to me that the needs of my daughter comes first and  I need to discard my fears and insecurity, its certainly not helping her.


So my first emphasis was getting to the weekly  story and rhyme sessions they had at our local library. The Northwood library is a small two story building where at the top level is more the quiet room with books for adults and college students and at the lower level they have a small area for the kids  with shelves of toddler, baby and self- help mommy books. Also they have colorful tables and animal chairs with paper and crayons for coloring.  What I love is that its usually full with kids of all ages and descent and makes me wonder why I was so afraid to attend, it seems so harmless and make me realize the insecurities were all in my head.

The classes are  usually held on Wednesday at 10am. In the kids area, the little tables and chairs have been pushed aside and a colorful cloth is put on the ground for all the toddlers to sit and also there is a box of rattles. The class is usually packed and we all sit around. There are two librarian who read the  books and nursery rhymes are very engaging. The first week I took my daughter she was literally shocked to see so many children and more so they knew all the rhymes she did. For the first few weeks, my daughter was in the stare and observe mode but since now we have been so often she has started participating in the rhymes which I am really glad. At the end of the rhyming session, they always have a creative making project which I absolutely love .My daughter might not be there yet to enjoy making them, but once we are done she loves it.Here are some of the projects we have done so far :




I think that is amazing that have these classes for babies and toddlers. I am happy that I am able to take her, it has also made me give in to absconding those fears of mine. My child is happy and I am happy. If you are like me, don't deter taking your child. For more information you can look at the local library website.


Thursday, June 6, 2013

On a clearer note - Why I am blogging!




I have always wanted to blog. Its my medium to express my thoughts and feelings. You would think why not then have a diary it seems more reasonable but blogging has that capability of interaction with people from all over the world. Its being able to connect with people with similar likes and dislikes. I would have liked to have a group of gals I would like to gossip to but since being in London I haven't. Therefore its here I want to let my thoughts flow and relieve my frustrations. Although I am still a skeptic of how much personal information should I blog about, I don't want the whole world knowing my problems. And for problems now,I don't have many, life now has become more or less very mundane but on the course of my life, lot of things happened that have left me embittered. And as by writing I can set them free so I can no longer hold on to them.
Another reason I love writing, my writing I believe is not up to par but blogging helps me hone my writing skills. And practice only makes it better which delves me into my ulterior motive - maybe a part-time scope in freelance writing. But everything in life needs to be worked hard at and that's what I intend to do. I want to read a lot and write a lot. Being a stay-at-home mom doesn't make it easy, the needs of my little one come first but now that she has grown a bit and I have the time- this seems the like the best hobby possible.